A Nancy Drew Movie

When I was 11 years old, my sister and I decided that we would do something no one had ever done before (meaning that we simply weren't aware that several people had done it before). We began production on a Nancy Drew- wait for it- MOVIE!

We chose to base it off of book #152: The Key in the Satin Pocket. This was mostly because #122: The Message in the Haunted Mansion required a mansion, and also because we didn't have any snow (as necessitated by #158: The Curse of the Black Cat).

It was going to sell out like crazy in our garage-theater showings, and Hollywood people (just people from Hollywood) would be begging us for the rights to screen it nation-wide. It would be our big break, the project that would catapult us pre-teen filmmaking prodigies to fame and global recognition. Our best friend, who played Nancy, would be lauded for her powerful performance, while our classmate (in a relatively minor role) would steal the show, ensuring that she would instantly be asked to star in the next Sandra Bullock movie.

We had everything planned out perfectly. From my own wardrobe and an old costume basket, I picked out costumes for each character and folded them into boxes labeled with the actresses' names. I wrote out a screenplay with a full list of actresses to appear in the film (I didn't have any close male friends at this time, so all of the characters were just female). I even created a magazine that would be released just before the movie, with bios of everyone involved in the making of it, speculation on what the next Nancy Drew film would be, a detailed history of the series, and a sweepstakes to 'win a day with the stars!'.

Did we hit it big? Were we met with high acclaim and rampant success?

No. You could have guessed that, I'm sure, but I'm feeling nostalgic today and I want to recount every way in which our attempt at a Nancy Drew movie was pretty pathetic but also inadvertently one of my favorite childhood memories.

1) It was essentially a home video of us having fun with our friends. Although I had a detailed script that everyone was supposed to follow, my friends usually either forgot their lines or randomly threw in their own comments. Example:

Friend [as Nancy]: There's something in the pocket... hey, it's a key! And it has a number on it- 682.
Me [filming off to the side]: Shh, that's not important.
Friend: What?
Me: That's not in the script!
Friend: Well it DOES have a number on it though...
Me: But it's not- whatever, cut.

Mistakes aside, my sister made a huge deal out of creating a snack table and inviting a few friends that weren't actually in the movie...

Me: Why is so-and-so coming? She's not in the movie.
My sister: She's going to help though!
*Invitee eats snacks all day*

2) We hardly knew how to operate a video camera, let alone transfer it to a computer program in which we could edit it. First of all, we didn't understand that movies aren't filmed beginning to end- they're filmed around the availability of sets, weather, etc. (For instance, the first scene shot in Harry Potter and the Philosopher's Stone was actually the last scene in the movie.) So where did we begin filming our movie? That's right, at the beginning. If you watched the whole thing (and unfortunately this tape has gone missing somewhere) you could see some semblance of a story, with an in-movie blooper reel. My favorite part is the 3-second take of our friend's cat wearing a Santa Claus hat (it was her video camera, and she decided she needed to film her cat's first Christmas, even if it meant taping over it later). Because we had no idea how to edit this film, my sister and I decided that we would do something revolutionary: instead of having a blooper reel at the very end of the movie, we would keep all the mistakes in the film. Not only would the mystery keep the audience in suspense, but it would let them know how funny we were. (Even though we weren't.)

3) We spent more time talking about how awesome the movie would be and planning for the premiere that we usually forgot the whole matter of actually filming it. I think we stuck to this project for about six months before ditching it. This rang true for pretty much any story I tried to write during adolescence- my plans for a Mary-Kate and Ashley-esque mystery series (The Adventures of Kelly and Leslie: Cousin Detectives), my novel about the Rainbow Tree (based very, very loosely on my memories about a magical tree in the schoolyard and my best friend and I always played at), and any number of mystery/fantasy books. And unfortunately, this movie was no exception- while I got caught up in publicizing it and running my friends through mock interviews to prepare them for the upcoming flurry of press coverage they would be subjected to, we had filmed a total of five scenes and about three times as many bloopers (although if you called them 'bloopers', 12-year-old me would sniff and say that they're just as integral to the movie as the takes that actually went according to plan).

But you know, in hindsight I can't really hide my face in shame. After all, we were just kids. And my parents' support and encouragement of this project was not so much about us showing the world our talents through a Nancy Drew movie- it was about letting us be kids. I'm sure they thought our movie was totally ridiculous. But that's not what mattered. And looking back, as painfully bad as our movie was, the memories it created were anything but.

(See? Nostalgia. It's one thing that brings me back to Nancy Drew when times are tough/busy.)

Resistance

I could go into all of the reasons why my sad little blog has been, once again, left quiet and untouched. But instead, I want to talk about something else- something that makes me angry. It isn't related to Nancy Drew, although knowing our heroine and her belief in the goodness of the police, I'm pretty sure she'd be pissed too. This is why:


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WmJmmnMkuEM&feature=related

Last Friday, I hopped on a train to go home and spend the weekend with my family. About an hour after I arrived home, I found this video posted all over Facebook. Unlike those that I had seen of police brutality in Berkeley, Oakland, and New York, this video showed a place that I recognize well and faces that I know. On the Quad that I walk through every day, police were arresting, beating, and pepper-spraying my friends, classmates, co-workers, and residents. Not because they were being violent, but because they were quietly linking arms in peaceful protest. They were being sprayed not from a distance of 15 feet (the legal minimum distance), but from about 3 feet away- and for some protesters, the substance was sprayed directly in their faces and down their throats. They were being sprayed and arrested not because they served any threat to police officers, as our Chief of Police Annette Spicuzza asserted, or because this group of cops was separated from their colleagues and consequently felt unsafe. Rather, police officers in riot gear who were armed with rubber pellet rifles and pepper spray felt, for god knows what reason, that dismantling the Occupy tents (which was the order given by Chancellor Katehi) was not enough. If you can step over the line of protesters and casually wave around your can of pepper spray, and if you can aim your weapons at students and have them back away, you are not threatened in any way.


These weren't just students at my school that I didn't know. Some of my family members are ardently opposed to the Occupy movement and have no idea that I have been protesting with them for just over a week. But these aunts and uncles will be shocked to learn that I actually know these crazy students who, according to some news reports, shouldn't be complaining because they didn't move when they were told to. They might be surprised to know that my friend from work was sent to the hospital with chemical burns. She was sprayed directly in the face, despite the 'ASTHMATIC!' warning written in Sharpie on her arm. A classmate of mine was also a part of the chain and was pepper-sprayed- there are videos of her on CNN wiping the face of another protester with her headscarf. Two other friends of mine- one a former co-worker, and another a former resident- were standing by and watching in horror, whilst the wind also blew some of the pepper spray in their direction. One of my History TAs was arrested, as was one of my residents who was not doing anything at all (he was cited for 'lodging without a permit' when he did not even have a tent at the encampment). These aren't crazy activists who don't go to class and spend their days lazily sitting around in tents- these are everyday students who attend UC Davis and work hard just to stay there, especially at a time when we face a potential 81% tuition increase. And they were met with violence because they sat peacefully in a circle and linked arms, or because they had the audacity to stand by and watch.

But here's the upside:






We're not going away.

Nancy Drew & Hardy Boys Supermystery #1: Double Crossing

NANCY DREW is enjoying a luxury cruise aboard the ship where her friend George is the new social director. It seems like great fun until Nancy overhears a plan to sell CIA secrets to another country. Her vacation turns into a high-risk hunt for a deadly secret agent.

Meanwhile...

THE HARDY BOYS are working undercover on the same cruise ship – Joe in the kitchen, Frank as photographer – trying to track down a dangerous group of thieves who prey on rich passengers.

But when murder comes aboard, Nancy, Joe, and Frank find they're in the same boat – facing death on all sides in DOUBLE CROSSING.


That's right – it's not just Nancy Drew, and it's not just the Hardy Boys. It's a NANCY DREW & HARDY BOYS SUPERMYSTERY.
I read one or two of these as a kid and I distinctly recall being completely taken aback to see the word 'sexy' in a book for children. However, now that I've read Double Crossing (the very first in the crossover series), it doesn't surprise me at all. I will give the author some credit here in that the story itself was not bad – Nancy is on the cruise ship for vacation and happens to run into a mystery (so what else is new?) while the Hardy Boys are already on a case (they don't need luck like Nancy because people actually pay them to do these things- I'd like to see the tables turn some day!). They help each other out with the two cases, get conked on the head and left for dead a few times, and nab the culprits in the end. The action sequences are imaginative (in a good way), and the 'bad guys' they're facing aren't bumbling idiots throwing in halfhearted attempts to scare Nancy, Frank, and Joe off the case – they are actually dangerous people.

So despite the ridiculous romance aspects to this book (and I'll get to that shortly), it wasn't entirely a waste of my time. I actually quite enjoyed it and, as my family can attest to, I spent much of our vacation curled up with this book in a fort I built in the closet (because just sitting in a chair or on the couch wasn't awesome enough).

However, I do need to point out some things, as always. On the subject of romance, if I can just share a passage here that caught my attention (note that this is only 4 pages into the book, and Nancy and Frank have barely been introduced):

Nancy unpacked quickly, pulling a card from Ned Nickerson out of her purse and putting it on top of her bureau, where she could look at it. She read it once again.
“My dear Ms. Detective,” it said. “While you're sailing off into the sunset, how am I supposed to solve a not-so-mysterious case of loneliness? Miss you, and see you when I get home. Love, Ned.”
What a guy. Ned Nickerson had to be the greatest boyfriend a girl ever had or ever could have. Nancy promised herself that no matter how good-looking the guys were on this cruise, she wasn't even going to think about romance.
And especially not with Frank Hardy. She'd crossed paths with Frank Hardy and his brother before, and every time she did, Frank had the same powerful effect on her. Nothing had ever happened between them, though, and it wasn't going to this time, either. She had a boyfriend, he had a girlfriend – and that was that. (4)

We've hardly met Nancy and Frank. As far as anyone is concerned, these could be the first impressions that a young girl or boy has of these two characters. And four pages in, Nancy is already having to remind herself of the reasons why she can't hit it off with Frank. Really now, the ghostwriter wasn't even trying to hint at the romantic tension here. In 1988, subtlety was apparently out the window for any contact between Nancy Drew and Frank Hardy. Later in the book, they even defy the pool rules to go for a midnight swim together. Said swim is naturally ruined when Nancy finds a dead body in the pool, but no big deal. Frank is there to hold her in his warm arms and tell her it's all going to be okay.

The interesting thing is that one character in particular, usually ignored in these types of story arcs, gets a guy of her own.

Nancy watched as George and David swept across the dance floor to a hot Latin beat. Their eyes were locked together, and it wasn't hard to tell that they were getting very interested in each other. (19)

For a little background, David is one guy in a group of five bratty CIA kids on board the cruise ship. Supposedly, David is the only somewhat-friendly one of the entire group, but Nancy questions his motives continuously throughout the book. And for once, George gets a taste of what Bess has to deal with all the time:

George's eyes widened. “Wait just a minute. You're not saying that you think David's involved in all this spy business, are you?” (55)

Oh sweetheart. Haven't you learned anything from Nancy's cases in all these years? Why do you think your cousin is perpetually single? Whenever a good-looking guy comes along, inevitably Nancy either takes him for herself, or he displays an interest in Bess and then turns out to be the culprit. The latter always ends with Nancy handing him over to law enforcement authorities after an action-packed finale revealing a huge twist in the identity of the burglar/saboteur/criminal mastermind – except it's not a twist because if you've read as many Nancy Drew books as I have, the predictability of such books is heightened considerably.

Although, to credit the author yet again, David turns out all right in the end and promises to keep in touch with George. I suppose it's just Bess who gets the shaft every time. And meanwhile, Nancy glows with pride at another job well done. *Snaps for Nancy!* /Legally Blonde

Stay tuned for another installment (cross your fingers for the long-overdue Mysterious Mannequin post)!

Istanbul (Not Constantinople)

SURPRISE!
I'm off to explore the sunny, humid banks of the Bosphorus. For the entirety of July, my life will consist of learning about Ottoman history, visiting many of the sites and mosques my professor talks about in class, and meeting new people on the other side of the world who will show me around the beautiful city of Istanbul (not Constantinople).

Aside from enjoying my experience there, I have two other things planned:
1) EPIC Harry Potter marathon leading up to the release of Pt. II of the seventh (and last) film. The last resounding note of my childhood will slowly die out as Harry takes his final walk into the Forbidden Forest. And although I will be saying goodbye to Harry Potter in a very different way than I had imagined, it will not go without tears and very fond memories.
2) And of course, Nancy Drew. Just so you all know, Nancy has actually traveled to Istanbul before- which is why #47: The Mysterious Mannequin is tucked away in my carry-on bag. It shall serve me well when I can't sleep on the plane or when I'd like to give my 700-page reader a rest (not that it's had much wear... at all).

So this was all 100% exciting and everything, until I happened to read this (courtesy of Wikipedia):

Beginning 2 March 2011 access to Blogspot was blocked, following a request by satellite television provider Digiturk; Digiturk alleged Blogger was being used to distribute material it holds the broadcast rights to.

In other words, I can't actually access my blog because the Turkish government has really tight restrictions on... well, a lot of things when it comes to the Internet, apparently. YouTube was banned in Turkey because someone posted a video that offended Ataturk, the founder of the modern state of Turkey. This is pretty sad considering Turkey is a relatively liberal country (and anyhow, everyone knows that half the people on YouTube are crazies who start verbal to-the-death battles all because someone misspelled a word).

I'm going to be writing throughout July, and see if I can get my sister or someone nice to post everything for me. Nice, wonderful siblings/friends/parents/relatives who would just love to help my cause... right?

Have a peachy July :)

#7: The Clue in the Diary

Back to some good old (actually old) Nancy Drew, circa 1932... well, kind of- we'll just say 1962 since that's when it was revised. But this was one of the very first in the original Nancy Drew series, back when it was still developing. And on that note, I consider this book to be especially important because a major character is brought into the picture for the first time- Mr. Ned Nickerson!

Since I started reading these books, I never questioned that Ned had just always been a character- until I was reading the Nancy Drew Wiki page (since that's what I do when I'm bored) and discovered that Ned didn't exist at all in the first several books. Because this is also one of the most popular in the entire series, I figured it would be the next installment for me to tackle.

To sum things up, Nancy is driving home from a carnival with Bess and George, admiring the mansions in the hills beside the road, when the one they praise the most explodes before their very eyes (my guess is that Nancy can secretly blow things up using only the power of her mind... why? Because she's Nancy-freaking-Drew and she's a boss). They drive over quickly to help, and as Nancy is running around the house to make sure no one is hurt, she sees a man fleeing from the scene, leaving behind a diary- written in Swedish- in the grass. The man runs away and Nancy ponders for a while about who he is, whilst learning from neighbors that the mansion was owned by a Mr. Raybolt and his wife, two unpleasant people that everyone hated- mainly because Mr. Raybolt swindled people out of their money. However, the couple can't be found anywhere and it's very suspicious. As Nancy seeks out answers about the diary, the man running from the house, and the ill deeds/whereabouts of the Raybolts, she also helps a young woman named Mrs. Swenson and her 5-year-old daughter Honey, who are living in poverty since Mr. Swenson (an inventor) left to earn money for the family and never returned. Long story short (too late), Nancy discovers that the man fleeing the mansion was Mr. Swenson, who was angry with Mr. Raybolt for essentially stealing his invention- as was the case with many other inventors- and when the police arrest him, Nancy sets out to clear his name and catch Raybolt.

Now before I start talking about Ned, there is one little nitpicky thing I have to mention, because it totally drove me nuts- this entire book is basically just Nancy, Bess, and George (and sometimes Ned) driving around everywhere. I mean, everywhere. I don't know if she just has a bottomless tank of gas or what, but she woke up every day, picked up her besties in her sweet ride, and drove all over the countryside until she finally decided to go home at night (at which point she also decided at least once to get right back in her car and drive somewhere else). How your precious little convertible lasted through this book (let alone so many after it) is beyond me. But hey, if you derive pleasure from driving for hours to go ask someone you've never met a single question that they don't know the answer to, more power to you. Your dad's pretty wealthy, he'll buy you a new car when this one dies after a year- lucky you, Nancy!

Okay, now I'll turn back to the real purpose of this post- Ned Nickerson! Because, being the nerd that I am, I hold in high respect the introduction of a character- particularly one as important as Ned. How a character is first brought into a book or series can say a lot about them. What I find particularly funny about Ned's first appearance is that, at first, Nancy thinks he's trying to steal her car. I would insert an actual quote here because I dogeared the page specifically for that reason, but I seem to have misplaced my copy of The Clue in the Diary. Bah.

Ned is someone rarely seen in a bad light throughout the series- save for an early edition of #21: The Secret in the Attic (see my 'Old Favourites' post) and those few books in which Nancy runs off with other guys (see #77: The Bluebeard Room and #78: The Phantom of Venice). For a character who becomes sort of the Lois Lane to Nancy's Superman, it's pretty fantastic that he was initially painted to look the bad guy. I give major props to Millie Benson (the ghostwriter of this book and the original Carolyn Keene) for making the story of Nancy's and Ned's first meeting somewhat interesting, rather than some tired old chance meeting at a school dance. Which reminds me, since when does Nancy even go to school? Because I have plenty to say on that matter...

To sum this up, it really matters (in my mind) how characters are treated by the author who writes them. Before the tail-end of my freshman year of college (when I took a creative writing class that got me back into writing stories), I didn't seem to realize that the characters in every novel and short story are people. And so, they need to behave and speak as any normal person would do. They can have their quirks and their strange motives, but they're there because somehow, they hold a role in the story that cannot be left out. They are, by the author's definition, important. And so, knowing the role that Ned would come to have in almost every Nancy Drew book since 1932, I held my breath- and then relaxed a little, because Millie Benson (unlike so many ghostwriters after her) understood the importance of this character and she didn't drag him around.

That's it for this installment! Up next, stay tuned for #47: The Mysterious Mannequin. It's so mysterious that I don't even know what it's about yet.

Anddddddddd We're Back!

It's been a long, long (unannounced) hiatus. You can all (three of you) rest assured that my nine months away were productive and contributed to a great deal of growth.
My excuse, this time around, is simple enough: I was an RA (resident advisor) in the residence halls at my university. I won't say a whole lot about the things I dealt with (most of it stays confidential), but I will just say this: if you did not/do not appreciate your RA during your time in the dorms, take a moment to think about everything they did as part of their job. If they were any good, they spent nine months putting most of their energy into making your college experience enjoyable and safe, whilst also trying to help you learn and grow- creating bulletin boards, planning and implementing events, team-building, diversity discussions, enforcing policies, sitting in meetings, eating meals and spending time with residents, and teaching others about themselves and the world around them. All that while maintaining good grades, in some cases internships and other jobs, and (believe it or not) a social life.

To put it plainly, I've been pretty busy. If the next school year is at all easier than this past year, you'll be happy to know that after being an RA, I can surely find the time to read Nancy Drew books (like that's what I should be doing with my free time anyhow).

And now, let's get back to where we left off...

#99: The Secret at Seven Rocks

In a world of wild animals, Nancy faces the most dangerous beast of all- man.
(I just thought that was funny.)
Here we go again- Nancy, Bess, and George are on vacation, and a mystery comes along to ruin it all (but who would have expected anything different?). This time, they’re in Colorado for some hiking and fresh mountain air. While on a hike, they find a baby mountain lion which has been shot in the leg, and decide to take it to a shelter named Paws. Turns out, the shelter has been facing some mishaps of its own...

Nancy headed toward a large pen on the other end of the clearing. It contained a dish of water and an empty feeding bowl. The door to the pen was open, and the pen was empty.
“Dana,” Nancy called. “What kind of animal is staying in here?”
“That’s our-” Dana’s face turned pale and her eyes opened wide. “Oh no!” she cried. “Our black bear is loose!” (21)

Don’t you just hate it when your black bear escapes? Puts such a damper on everyone’s day. But no worries- Nancy is here to save the day!

Actually, what I quite liked about this installment is that our heroine isn’t quite the superhuman mega-sleuth that we see in almost every other book. She usually manages to keep her head completely clear, coming to a solution in the most desperate of situations, and she is physically fit and capable of chasing down any culprit. Nancy always has the right words to say (be it to comfort a friend or get herself out of a sticky situation), and she always has the right idea about how to escape danger in the split-second she’s given to figure it out.

But not in this book. At last we see a Nancy that isn’t quite as perfect as her writers so often make her out to be. For one thing, she is kidnapped on ‘Gaslight Night’- the night when everyone in town wears Victorian-era clothing and acts all old-school. Nancy finally wakes up on the side of a mountain, cold and disheveled. The beautiful ivory gown of silk and lace that she had rented to wear for the festivities isn’t so pretty anymore- it’s muddy and torn, and Nancy has a lot of explaining to do to the woman who owns the rental shop. And even if perfect Nancy had been able to keep it in pristine condition in her unconscious state, she is stranded on a mountainside in biting cold air and silk antique high heels- not quite as useful as hiking boots would be. And just because things have to be far worse for her, Nancy’s hands and feet are bound.

Since she's Nancy Drew, it's only natural that she'll get those ropes off in a matter of minutes, and then think of some ingenious plan so she doesn’t have to walk up or down a mountain in a dirty dress and pain-inducing footwear.

Apparently not. It takes our girl detective an enormous amount of time and energy just to lift herself into a sitting position. After doing so, she spots some semi-sharp rocks that MIGHT tear through the ropes, and they’re 50 feet up the hill; inch by inch, she scoots herself uphill (occasionally slipping, tumbling downhill, and having to start the process over again) and when she reaches the rocks it takes her hours to free her hands and feet. I don’t know about you, but that sounds like someone who is- dare I say it?- actually normal. Aside from the fact that someone felt threatened enough to kidnap her and dump her on a mountain, of course.

Then commences an effort to make it to some safer place- which isn't allowed to be easy, so the author throws a bear in there just to give her another obstacle. Does she know exactly what to do? Will she make it out alive thanks to her vast knowledge of the behavioral patterns of black bears? Well...

Frantically, she tried to recall the advice in Maggie's guidebook. What was it you were supposed to do when confronted by a bear?.... She couldn't remember. She couldn't move. Suddenly, Nancy realized that she might never make it off the mountain. (103)

Whoa whoa whoa- Nancy Drew, accepting the possibility that she might die? I know the reader is supposed to always cheer her on, but to see a moment of weakness in this seemingly-invincible protagonist brings a new dimension to her character that we never get to see. When she's always got the right idea in mind and just what she needs to save herself in a matter of seconds, her character is just flat. There is nothing there to suggest that our heroine might actually have fears and feelings.

As for the bear, one of Nancy's suspects happens to be nearby and shoots the creature with a tranquilizer gun. And then he and Nancy start arguing.

She looked at him in amazement. "Honestly, the bear was easier to talk to than you are!"
"Yeah, I saw you talking to the bear," Jesse said. "That was real impressive.... Don't you know the only way to scare off a bear is to make a lot of noise? You're supposed to bang on pots and pans or something."
"Silly me!" Nancy said. "I left all my pots and pans [at] home!" (109)

Whew, this girl's got some sass. There's something the polite debutante Nancy never would have dared said to anyone. (On that note, I think that this part of her character is a nice little reference to the Nancy of the original books as they were written in the 1930s-50s, prior to the 1959 revisions.)

And just to top things off, Nancy struggles to keep up with Dana and another character during the high-speed chase in the climax. They all reach an old wooden cabin, and while her friends sprint ahead, Nancy is kneeling down and catching her breath. In most other books, she would sprint like a gazelle and either catch the culprit or barely miss him.

My point here is that the Nancy we’ve become so accustomed to- the model Girl Scout-type who is always prepared and always has a plan, even with seconds to spare- maybe isn’t the one who girls should be looking up to. I truly enjoyed this book because it portrays Nancy in a different light. For once she’s human, and she can’t always keep up with the people around her, or know exactly what to say and do when confronted by an angry bear. She is just an average girl caught up in circumstances that she can’t control and doesn’t know how to handle.

Maybe we'd like to see this 'amateur' detective tackle every situation like the pro that she isn't. But perhaps it’s better that young girls can look up to someone who is not so extraordinary. Nancy is, in the eyes of many, a symbol of female empowerment. But girls have trouble feeling that empowerment for themselves if they can’t match up to a heroine who is physically strong and always has her wits about her. If Nancy Drew is a little less perfect, a little more ordinary, then young girls can look at her and see their own potential mirrored back at them through a girl that isn’t all that different from themselves but can still crack the case in the end. And if there's any meaning to be found in Nancy's escapades, it's that any girl, no matter how ordinary, is capable of anything.

#138: The Legend of the Lost Gold

This is one of the few books that I started reading when I was younger and never finished. I first picked it up because- surprise! It happens to be set in Big Sur, California, which is a seaside-forest area on the Northern coast. And if there’s one thing NorCal people like to boast about in contrast to the hot, beachy settings of Southern California (which seem to be the basis of so many stereotypes about our state), it’s the colder wilderness area of the upper part of Cali. And there are even beaches there- difference is, any girl walking around in a skimpy bikini, jumping around with her friends and taking a million pictures of how awesome they are together, is just bound to get laughed at. We love how mean we are to clueless teenagers who have never seen a cold beach before.

But back to this new mystery- Nancy travels to California with Bess and George for [what else?] another vacation. They check in at a Greek resort named Opa (which is rather random), and on their first day there someone ransacks their cabin. It turns into this huge mystery involving a legend about an old miner, Hubbard Wilson, who supposedly discovered a treasure of epic proportions. (That seems to be a weird stereotype about NorCal- that you can just dig a hole and find some gold. Trust me, it is not by any means true.) And of course, the culprit makes relentless attempts to drive the resort out of business and, for the benefit of all future criminals who dare to cross Nancy’s path, kill off our girl sleuth. Which reminds me, it’s quite remarkable that she makes it through 175 dangerous cases without dying. I don’t even know that she’s sat in a hospital bed before. As I’ve said before- invincible.

Another interesting addition to this book is a castle/mega-
mansion-type place called Cloud Palace. I suppose it was meant to sound all cool, like a castle in the clouds (which is actually fog). But the name makes it sound something like a magical place that the protagonists of a children’s fantasy film must reach after dodging unspeakable dangers (which are of a dark magic such that they’ve never seen before and that they could never perform themselves because they are the essence of innocence, or some crap).

In fact, the description of the place actually brings to mind images of Hearst Castle in San Simeon, CA. Check it out:





I think this ghostwriter had the idea right, but should have taken the time to come up with a better name. This isn’t Pokemon, this is a Nancy Drew book. Get it together.

On a final note (and this is me being all ‘correct’ in terms of details), it drove me nuts that the author wrote an earthquake into the climax when they don't seem to know the first thing about them. Technically speaking, I can’t claim that they’ve never felt an earthquake when I don’t know the person who wrote this book and consequently I know nothing whatever about them. But by the description they’ve given, it’s just not adding up. Following a tremor (during which pebbles fall from the ceiling and walls and the cave starts to shake), the girls are a little freaked out...

“What was that?” Bess said, her voice quavering. “The ground seemed to shake a little.”
“Don’t worry,” [the culprit] said, continuing his pacing. “It’s a common impression. People who explore caves- spelunkers- always feel as if the floor and walls are moving.” (140)

Okay, I really don’t care how entranced you are by the treasure you’ve just found in an underground cave. If there’s an earthquake and pebbles are tumbling down around you, you will feel it. As long as things are swaying and/or falling, you’re not going to be the one clueless person who didn’t feel the earthquake that everyone else is talking about. And furthermore...

Another rumble began.... It sounded as if the entire earth were being torn apart above them. (142)

Basic understanding of earthquakes: they happen deep within the earth, not on the surface. That is perhaps one of the most frightening things about them- it’s not just that the lamps are swaying back and forth and dishes are rattling in the kitchen cabinets. It’s that the ground itself is moving, shaking with an intensity that no one can control or even fully predict. Perhaps being in an underground cave would be an entirely different experience, but the idea that someone could not feel the quake or might consider themselves to be momentarily separate from the event is simply absurd.

I realize it's a nitpicky thing to argue about, and considering the target audience it shouldn't really matter. But what appear to be little details are very much common knowledge, and from all the things I learned by reading Nancy Drew books as a kid, I wouldn't count earthquakes among them- if anything, that's something you learn by experience. And while we can imagine all we want, it's hard to write something you've never experienced before when you don't put the work in. You've got to earn it.

Vacations

I should have known this would happen... I've spent my summer lollygagging and watching Australia's Next Top Model (America's is dead to me). And yes, I've been reading... but not blogging! And now, when I at last have plenty of material for several exciting posts- awww crap, it's vacation month.

'Vacation month' sounds like a good thing. All summer I've been looking forward to August because on the calendar is listed a weekend camping trip (that's over with, and it was quite lovely), a week-long stay in the mountains, and a week-long vacation that involves getting on a plane (and when a plane's involved, you know it's exciting).

Problem is, vacation also means that I don't have Internet. See why, in all my enthusiasm for August, I should have seen this coming?

Essentially, I've read several new books with plenty to write on, but I'm going out of town this week. Meaning that this parched blog has to troop on just a little longer before I can water it with new material.

Here's my plan: since this blog is just crawling along, I've got to up the pace. Let's put it at reading ONE NEW BOOK every week or two. In other words (since that 'or' sounds a little flimsy), should I fail to read at least one Nancy Drew book in a two-week period from now on, I will have to endure a day of slaps in the face from friends, classmates, and co-workers.

Maybe I'm just weird, but getting slapped doesn't sound all that appealing. Reading books is much nicer and I would rather keep up with that than deal with the former.

Other mentions for today:
1. I have one new book, #52: The Secret of the Forgotten City. I am very excited to read it.
2. I've read a few more as well, including #138: The Legend of the Lost Gold and #99: The Secret of the Seven Rocks. I haven't counted up in a while, so the books in the last two posts are being counted as well. I'm also currently reading #23: The Mystery of the Tolling Bell, as well as several other hardcover books (the book bag I'm taking on my trip is simply enormous).

Update:

1. The Secret in the Old Clock *#
2. The Hidden Staircase *#
3. The Bungalow Mystery #
4. The Mystery at Lilac Inn *#
5. The Secret at Shadow Ranch *#
6. The Secret of Red Gate Farm #
7. The Clue in the Diary #
8. Nancy's Mysterious Letter #
9. The Sign of the Twisted Candles #
10. The Password to Larkspur Lane
11. The Clue of the Broken Locket *#
12. The Message in the Hollow Oak *#
13. The Mystery of the Ivory Charm *
14. The Whispering Statue #
15. The Haunted Bridge #
16. The Clue of the Tapping Heels #
17. The Mystery of the Brass-Bound Trunk *#
18. The Mystery of the Moss-Covered Mansion
19. The Quest 0f the Missing Map *#
20. The Clue in the Jewel Box *#
21. The Secret in the Old Attic *#
22. The Clue in the Crumbling Wall
23. The Mystery of the Tolling Bell #
24. The Clue in the Old Album *
25. The Ghost of Blackwood Hall *
26. The Clue of the Leaning Chimney #
27. The Secret of the Wooden Lady
28. The Clue of the Black Keys
29. The Mystery at the Ski Jump
30. The Clue of the Velvet Mask
31. The Ringmaster's Secret
32. The Scarlet Slipper Mystery #
33. The Witch Tree Symbol
34. The Hidden Window Mystery *
35. The Haunted Showboat
36. The Secret of the Golden Pavilion
37. The Clue in the Old Stagecoach
38. The Mystery of the Fire Dragon
39. The Clue of the Dancing Puppet *#
40. The Moonstone Castle Mystery *
41. The Clue of the Whistling Bagpipes #
42. The Phantom of Pine Hill *#
43. The Mystery of the 99 Steps *#
44. The Clue in the Crossword Cipher
45. The Spider Sapphire Mystery
46. The Invisible Intruder
47. The Mysterious Mannequin
48. The Crooked Banister
49. The Secret of Mirror Bay *#
50. The Double Jinx Mystery #
51. Mystery of the Glowing Eye *
52. The Secret of the Forgotten City #
53. The Sky Phantom #
54. The Strange Message in the Parchment *#
55. Mystery of Crocodile Island
56. The Thirteenth Pearl #
57. The Triple Hoax #
58. The Flying Saucer Mystery
59. The Secret in the Old Lace
60. The Greek Symbol Mystery
61. The Swami's Ring #
62. The Kachina Doll Mystery
63. The Twin Dilemma *#
64. Captive Witness
65. Mystery of the Winged Lion
66. Race Against Time
67. The Sinister Omen
68. The Elusive Heiress *
69. Clue in the Ancient Disguise
70. The Broken Anchor *
71. The Silver Cobweb
72. The Haunted Carousel #
73. Enemy Match
74. The Mysteious Image
75. The Emerald-Eyed Cat Mystery #
76. The Eskimo's Secret #
77. The Bluebeard Room *#
78. The Phantom of Venice *#
79. The Double Horror of Fenley Place *#
80. The Case of the Disappearing Diamonds
81. The Mardi Gras Mystery *#
82. The Clue in the Camera
83. The Case of the Vanishing Veil *#
84. The Joker's Revenge
85. The Secret of Shady Glen *#
86. The Mystery of Misty Canyon
87. The Case of the Rising Stars
88. The Search for Cindy Austin *#
89. The Case of the Disappearing Deejay
90. The Puzzle at Pineview School
91. The Girl Who Couldn't Remember *
92. The Ghost of Craven Cove *#
93. The Case of the Safecracker's Secret
94. The Picture-Perfect Mystery *
95. The Silent Suspect
96. The Case of the Photo Finish
97. The Mystery of Magnolia Mansion *#
98. The Haunting of Horse Island
99. The Secret at Seven Rocks *#
100. A Secret in Time *
101. The Mystery of the Missing Millionairess *#
102. The Secret in the Dark
103. The Stranger in the Shadows *#
104. The Mystery of the Jade Tiger *#
105. The Clue in the Antique Trunk *
106. The Case of the Artful Crime #
107. The Secret of Miner's Creek
108. The Secret of the Tibetan Treasure
109. The Mystery of the Masked Rider *
110. The Nutcracker Ballet Mystery *#
111. The Secret at Solaire
112. Crime in the Queen's Court *#
113. The Secret Lost at Sea *#
114. The Search For the Silver Persian
115. The Suspect in the Smoke *#
116. The Case of the Twin Teddy Bears *#
117. Mystery on the Menu *#
118. Trouble at Lake Tahoe *#
119. Mystery of the Missing Mascot
120. The Case of the Floating Crime *#
121. The Fortune Teller's Secret *#
122. The Message in the Haunted Mansion *#
123. The Clue on the Silver Screen #
124. The Secret of the Scarlet Hand *
125. The Teen Model Mystery *#
126. The Riddle in the Rare Book *#
127. The Case of the Dangerous Solution *#
128. The Treasure in the Royal Tower *#
129. The Baby-Sitter Burglaries *#
130. The Sign of the Falcon #
131. The Hidden Inheritance
132. The Fox Hunt Mystery *#
133. The Mystery at the Crystal Palace *#
134. The Secret of the Forgotten Cave
135. The Riddle of the Ruby Gazelle *#
136. The Wedding Day Mystery *#
137. In Search of the Black Rose *#
138. The Legend of the Lost Gold *#
139. The Secret of Candlelight Inn *#
140. The Door-to-Door Deception
141. The Wild Cat Crime *
142. The Case of the Capital Intrigue *#
143. Mystery on Maui *
144. The E-Mail Mystery *#
145. The Missing Horse Mystery *#
146. The Ghost of the Lantern Lady *#
147. The Case of the Captured Queen *#
148. On the Trail of Trouble
149. The Clue of the Gold Doubloons #
150. Mystery at Moorsea Manor *#
151. The Chocolate-Covered Contest *#
152. The Key in the Satin Pocket *#
153. Whispers in the Fog *#
154. The Legend of the Emerald Lady *#
155. The Mystery in Tornado Alley *#
156. The Secret in the Stars *#
157. The Music Festival Mystery #
158. The Curse of the Black Cat *#
159. The Secret of the Fiery Chamber *#
160. The Clue on the Crystal Dove *#
161. Lost in the Everglades *#
162. The Case of the Lost Song *#
163. The Clues Challenge *#
164. The Mystery of the Mother Wolf *#
165. The Crime Lab Case *#
166. The Case of the Creative Crime *#
167. Mystery by Moonlight *#
168. The Bike Tour Mystery *#
169. The Mistletoe Mystery *#
170. No Strings Attached *#
171. Intrigue at the Grand Opera *#
172. The Riding Club Crime *#
173. Danger on the Great Lakes *#
174. A Taste of Danger *#
175. Werewolf in a Winter Wonderland *#

* = Read (97)
# = Owned (108)


I'll be back in a week to share plenty more adventures with Nancy. Stay tuned!

#117 : The Mystery on the Menu

You know those books where you could swear the author was just kidding the whole time? Well, here we go- it's another of those books. Although I must say, I can't blame the author for just having a bit of a laugh. These are Nancy Drew books, after all, and a young girl isn't necessarily going to know the difference- I certainly wouldn't have. I think every now and then, the next installment shouldn't be taken so seriously. And heck, this time around the joke was clear before I even opened the book. In other words, check out the sub-text on the cover:
On Valentine's Day in a culinary paradise, Nancy uncovers the perfect recipe for disaster!

These books are never without their witty remarks. And that's just the beginning- I made a point of counting all of the bad pun/play-on-words statements in the description on the back cover. Final count: 12. In a single paragraph. Allow me to lead you through it if you don't believe me...

When crime takes the cake [That's 1!], it's time for Nancy to eat, drink, and be wary! [2]
George's prize-winning Raspberry Chiffon Cake has earned her, Bess, and Nancy a week at the Wolfe Culinary Institute in upstate New York. But soon after their arrival, Nancy discovers that ambition, jealousy, and greed are also on the menu [3]. Attempted murder provides plenty of food for thought [4], but that's a mere appetizer to the dangers to come [5].
In her search for the chef with a taste for terror [6], Nancy knows she'll have to watch her diet and watch her back [7]. The kitchen is crammed with suspects [8], and tensions are fast coming to a boil [9]. The knives are all sharp [10], the ingredients are all poison [11], and the final course- most likely fatal- has yet to be served! [12]

I find it funny how through that entire description, the only thing anyone can gather about the story is that- once again- our girl detective has gone on vacay with her besties. Oh, and there's a mystery... or else someone just thought it would be funny to write 'jealousy' on the menu. I don't know about you, but that doesn't sound very tasty.
Just to clear things up, there are strange incidents going on at the institute that seem to be targeted mainly at two professional chefs each teaching classes for the program (one of the two is to be chosen as a permanent teacher at the institute, which incriminates both of them). And then the culprit turns his/her attention to Nancy, just because she's there (she really can't help the investigating- she does that part in her sleep). So that's the story.

Now let's open the book- no wait! What's this?!



Gosh, even the cover artist is enjoying himself! I know everything I need to know about this book before I've even started reading it.
And now, a ton of passages that I have very much been relishing the thought of ridiculing (hahaha... 'relish', get it? I know- I'm just as bad as these wisecrack ghostwriters).
First up, the girls arrive at the culinary school and are shown to their dorm room:

The girls fell in love with their room immediately. It was airy and artfully decorated, with dark mahogany paneling, purple velvet curtains, and an ornate Oriental rug. Still-life paintings of food adorned the walls. (5)

Okay, it's time for me to go all pessimistic-college-student on this description. While Nancy gets a large, pretty dorm room with mahogany and velvet, most college students get something else. Visually speaking:

What Nancy sees when she walks through the door...


Versus what the average college freshman sees when they walk in...


Nancy is high society wherever she goes. I bet you'd walk into the room next door to hers and find that it looks more like the one in the latter photo. Just because whoever gets that room is not Nancy Drew.

Now, allow me a moment to address the old issue of the origins of George's name (not in terms of etymology, but rather why George has a boy's name):

The woman flipped back a strand of long, curly auburn hair and rolled her eyes. "[Teddy is] short for Theodosia..." She studied George. "What about you? What does 'George' stand for?"
"Georgia," George replied, smiling with understanding. (7)

This adds to the old debate of George's name- while some books state that her name is short for 'Georgia', others claim that her parents wanted a boy child and, when she was born and they discovered otherwise, they named her George anyhow. I personally am a fan of the latter hypothesis. While it might not be as probable, I'd like to think that George has always been just George.
I realise that was a bit random- but if ever I write a Nancy Drew encyclopedia (and believe me when I say that's highly possible) clearing that up would be nice.

And speaking of random:
"Alicia's story sounds convincing, doesn't it?" Nancy said. "I can see Regis Brady resenting Alicia and trying to bully her into leaving the institute." She bit into a cranberry muffin. "Yum." (38).

This ghostwriter must really love food. They masterly intertwine Nancy's thoughts on the case with her contemplation of every bite of food she puts in her mouth. "Yum"... what stunning detail.

One of the best things about this book is the character of Regis Brady. Regis is one of the two professional chefs teaching in the program, and he is completely full of himself and overly pompous. My favourite 'Regis Moment' is when the chef (with his two dogs yipping around at his heels) gets a knife thrown at him.

As the knife clattered against the wall right behind his head, Regis dove under the table.
"We're under attack!" he cried out. "Peaches, Truffles, seek cover!" (44)

So I know someone just tried to kill him and all, but the language makes his reaction a little excessive. Talk about paranoia- I really think this guy is schizophrenic. Next, I bet he'll start hearing voices. Which actually fits in rather nicely with my next point:

Nancy pushed her way to the front of the crowd to see what was the matter. On the far wall, facing them, big red letters oozed and dripped like blood. The ominous message read: Who Will Be Next? (87)

Ya know, this sounds vaguely familiar...



OMG
no way.
I think Nancy needs to warn everyone to look around corners with mirrors and- should they be attacked- avoid looking into the creature's eyes, because the institute has a basilisk slithering around. They might want to check out the pipes and sewage system, since that's probably how it's been getting around. Oh, and keep a look out for Voldemort- he might be lurking in somebody's diary. But for now, it is likely the school will be closed. /Professor McGonagall

Except that, as it turns out, the culprit isn't Voldemort after all. It was just another of the students in the program- how not extraordinary. The only satisfaction I get out of this insipid ending is the fact that they lock up the culprit- quite literally, in his bathroom.
Nancy really knows how to please.

Which is why another installment is on the way... as always, stay tuned!

#142: The Case of Capital Intrigue

You can tell a lot about a ghostwriter by the Nancy Drew book they write. And I'm not wasting any time in expressing that message here, because it's written in every word of this book.
Let me start off with what I expected from this installment: Nancy goes to Washington D.C. to visit George, who (despite having no experience at... anything) has landed a photography internship at the White House. Nancy and George cruise around, talking animatedly about the history behind every single monument they pass. Someone steals a rare artifact given to the United States President from the leader of a made-up country named San Valente, and Nancy helps the FBI find both the artifact and the kidnapped ambassador. The president shakes her hand, and then she goes back to River Heights to continue her insipid life of accidentally stumbling into the mysteries that criminals just lay at her feet.

Yet that isn't quite what I got, and it's not a bad thing. In all the Nancy Drew books I've read, it is remarkably rare to come across one that so clearly aspires to be something more. I don't mean to degrade Nancy Drew books, but they generally come in the same basic formula: Nancy goes on vacation with Bess and George, someone sabotages the resort they're staying at, and it's up to our girl sleuth and her friends to figure out which of five characters sees some bit of gain in doing nasty things to nice people. Every mystery varies, but the point is they're not incredibly creative when it comes to plot.

But in this book, I saw a glimpse of the person writing. This can be either a plus or a minus. Good fiction will always be barren of authorial evidence- that is, if the author is placing some symbol or turning point in the story, it shouldn't be immediately obvious to the reader what the writer is trying to do (this can be a tough point of criticism for those- such as myself- who write stories heavy with epiphany). In other words, you don't want to see evidence of the author peeking through. But on the other hand, I would have to argue that reading something which gives us an insight into the author's own thoughts is extremely valuable.

I'm saying this because this particular book reads very much like a mystery-adventure-thriller (think Deception Point by Dan Brown). By this I mean that Nancy is investigating an inside job from the start, since the perpetrator appears to be someone working in the White House. I could have expected that of course, but the attention to detail is astounding, and the story goes on and on along the lines of what should be a full-length novel. Nancy befriends one of the interns, Eduardo, whose father happens to be the ambassador of San Valente. The two grow close, though Nancy's trust in Eduardo is thrown into question when she discovers that he was once involved with a gang in his home country. And then, as the two are out for a midnight walk at the Lincoln Memorial, a masked gunman attempts to hunt them down. They duck behind the mammoth statue of Lincoln while bullets mar the white marble, and then they make a miraculous escape. The next day, the adventure continues as the twosome race to the Watergate Complex to rescue Eduardo's kidnapped father, and then evade the police and rush back to the White House, enlisting the help of a couple of very trusting Secret Service agents to crack down on the perpetrator before time runs out.

Now if this doesn't sound even vaguely like a Dan Brown thriller (minus all of the history and crazy conspiracy theories), you should just slap yourself. The ghostwriter took a few steps here that were especially daring. I'll be honest, I for one am just a little perturbed by the notion of a gunman shooting at the Lincoln Memorial and defacing what is arguably the most magnificent statue in D.C. This may also have something to do with the fact that I regard Abraham Lincoln very highly for his dedication to preserving the Union (and the fact that I am a history nerd to begin with). But that's the daring move: taking something familiar, something of value, and creating a dangerous scenario around it. And this ghostwriter did it in a Nancy Drew book, not even hesitating to supply two of the 'good guys' with pistols as they creep through a hallway of the Watergate Hotel on a mission to save the ambassador. The characters aren't messing around here- it's gritty and it's not nice. But that's what makes this book stand out.

Furthermore, as with all thrillers, the protagonist has to have a love interest- and in case you were wondering, it's not Ned. I know I get on Nancy's case a lot for sporadically prancing around with other guys, but take a look...


Given the artist's rendition of Eduardo, I can't really blame Nancy.
And anyhow, this is just another risk the writer took (successfully, I might add). As you've seen, I am consistently ragging on Nancy whenever some guy appears in the middle of a case- but not now. The author does an incredible job of making their friendship sweet and subtle (until a slightly sappy ending, but let's not get too down about that). It isn't overdone, and most importantly Nancy remains true to herself throughout. She isn't hanging on Eduardo the entire time, forgetting about the case, or landing herself in any trouble that only a man could save her from. She's the Nancy we know and love, but she's showing us that doesn't have to change just because there's a new guy around. It's a breath of fresh air.

Any reader could easily qualify this book as just another Nancy Drew book, in which she goes on a trip, finds herself knee-deep in yet another mystery, and is consistently targeted by criminals who want this snoopy girl detective out of the way. But I'm pointing out the differences between this and other installments because, as I've said, it wants to be so much more. Given a few hundred pages, this episode in the life of Ms. Drew could make up a full-length novel.

And that's where I come back to my main point here: in this story, I see a writer who maybe doesn't want to write Nancy Drew books for a lifetime, someone who wants to be recognized for writing good, enjoyable fiction, though they know they're just blessed to have a job. So they channel their creativity, their penchant for adventurous mystery-thrillers, into the only secure medium they have if they're going to make ends meet as a writer.

It's a tough world out there for people who just want to write- you can crank out the novels and short stories, but the chances of getting published are slim to none. If ever someone gives it a go and sticks at it despite the constant letdowns from publishers, it's not because they think they'll get published someday. It's because they love to write.

Seeing the author through their words isn't always a bad thing- and when there's only so much you can expect from a Nancy Drew book, catching onto these things and thinking about them means quite a lot. Because behind every one of these cheesy books with varying degrees of impracticality, there is someone whose dreams haven't quite been fulfilled. And the most striking part is that they understand this, they accept it, and they keep writing.

Homecoming Surprise

I've been home for a whole week, and it is heaven.
Imagine late afternoons, lying in the grass, with a book in hand and some tea and biscuits on a tray. Imagine staying up late to watch re-runs of Felicity and The X-Files. Imagine waking up at 4am to catch live World Cup games. (Before yesterday, I was fully confident that Spain had this entire tournament in the bag- and now they have to win the next two games just to go on to the next round. Words cannot express how pissed I am about that.) And lastly, imagine a surprise package in the mailbox.
When I saw it was addressed to me, I assumed it was one of the used book companies on Amazon that I had ordered textbooks from months ago, and they had finally decided to ship me the books I didn't even need anymore. For whatever reason, my sister kept hovering behind me as I made feeble attempts to tear the package open with my nails. And when I at last slit into the plastic and peeled some of it away, I was shocked to see that oh-so-familiar font on a white paperback spine...


My sister had actually gone online and ordered five paperback books as a homecoming present for me. I am still thoroughly excited that I now have five books that are fairly difficult to come across. One drawback, however...

The pre-teen girl who last owned this book just looooooovvvved hearts. So much so that she had to draw them all over one of her Nancy Drew books.
I suppose I'll just have to deal with it- point is, I have five new books to add to my list, as well as a bundle of the old hardcover books that my sister also bought for me while I was away. I am now the proud owner of:

#12 - The Message in the Hollow Oak
#14 - The Whispering Statue
#15 - The Haunted Bridge
#17 - Mystery of the Brass-Bound Trunk
#19 - Quest of the Missing Map
#20 - The Clue in the Jewel Box
#72 - The Haunted Carousel
#117 - Mystery on the Menu
#130 - Sign of the Falcon
#138 - Legend of the Lost Gold
#142 - The Case of Capital Intrigue

That puts my total owned at 107! Hooray for progress!

SUMMER LOVE!

I'm feeling like a bit of a hippie at the moment. And I'm pretty sure it's because the sun is consistently shining its burning rays at last, and the Spring season is no longer perforated with those random days where the sky sits back and thinks, 'Hmmph. I like being gray and pouring rain on people. I am a grumpy expanse of air and I fully intend to ruin May and June for people because I'm just so darn grumpy. Hmmph.'
Gosh darn you, gray sky!

But the point is that I am finally able to walk barefoot through the park (except in the morning when there's dew everywhere... ewww) and I can lie in the grass and sing to the birds, who fly away embittered.
In two days, I will be done with finals and- provided I don't procrastinate- my room will be all packed up, ready for me to return home for a blissful three months. And with summer comes... oh my gosh, I've been waiting for this for weeks:
FREEDOM!
That is, freedom to sleep in without missing detailed lectures or a useful chunk of study time. And of course, the freedom to read whatever the hell I want, whenever I want. You know what's coming, and I hate Predictability (it is the arch-nemesis I find myself battling most often on my frequent late-night crime-fighting sprees). So instead of talking about some random girl sleuth- who by the way has absolutely nothing to do with this blog- here's my [projected] list of summer reading:


1. Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows by J.K. Rowling

• I think re-reading this book will become a summer ritual of mine. I could go on and on about the symbolism in it, especially in the final chapters (during which I always cry- and believe me when I say it takes a lot for a book to make me cry. Movies, of course, are another matter). Thankfully, I've already gotten through about half of it over the course of this past quarter (when all the studying gets you down, nothing will heal your pain like Harry Potter will). Problem is, I'm worried I might finish it and then desperately want to read all the other books again. I'm already craving the audacity of students creating Dumbledore's Army under the snobby nose of one Dolores Umbridge. But anyhow...

2. The Devil Wears Prada by Lauren Weisberger

• For someone who loves fashion as much as I do, I am just as shocked as everyone else by the fact that I've never read this book. And really, I can't wait to read it just because I know I'll understand even the most obscure references. Hooray me! Hopefully, I'll also find it engaging and well-written, more so than Fashion Babylon (by Imogen Edwards-Jones), which does an excellent job explaining the inner workings of the fashion industry... but my goodness, she could at least learn to write some plausible dialogue and more developed characters. And I could at least keep myself from going off on tangents whilst writing this blog.

3. The Blind Assassin by Margaret Atwood

• This is one of the many books that I started reading last summer and never finished, even though I was thoroughly enjoying it. I imagine the problem was that at the time, I was still tired out from an exhausting school year and wasn't in much of a mood for the constant switches in narrative. This time around, I'll still be tired after yet another year of studies, but I also have an insatiable thirst for good literature. Bring it on.

4. Catch-22 by Joseph Heller

• Perhaps it sounds a bit morbid that I have a thing for war novels and plays (Slaughterhouse-Five, The Handmaid's Tale, Mother Courage and her Children, etc.). I can only hope that my fascination with literature critical of war will offer me insight in whatever I end up doing in life- preferably, some sort of writing, teaching, or peace work.

5. 1984 by George Orwell

• According to my high school Economics/Civil War teacher, there is one book that every young student must read at some point: 1984. Having read the first couple chapters, I already understand why. But as with The Blind Assassin, I just didn't have the drive to read such a dense book when I had just gotten out of school. Here's to giving it another try!

6. If On a Winter's Night a Traveler by Italo Calvino

• One of my many inspiring English teachers from high school- who taught an entire class on Calvino's work and contributed to the soft spot I have for this author- told me that I would have to try reading this book at least 6 or 7 times before I was able to finish it. That's why this book isn't on my list as something I wish to finish reading this summer- but I want to get through the first try. And anyhow, I'm really missing that Calvino-esque 'meta' style in his works. Perhaps I'll end up reading some of his short story collections as well.

7. Death on the Nile by Agatha Christie

• If there is one writer who can craft an impeccable murder mystery, it's Agatha Christie (that sort of almost rhymed, but didn't really). I first read The Clocks in 7th grade and loved it- which is remarkable considering it's one of her lesser-known works. And Then There Were None, Murder on the Orient Express, and The Mirror Crack'd are some of my favourites from her- and who could deny any love for Miss Jane Marple after this profound, simple statement: 'Murder is stupid.' None could. And so I'm setting off to read what is perhaps her most classic piece.

8. Reading Lolita in Tehran by Azar Nafisi

• The story of how I came across this book is a good illustration of the nerd in me. It goes like this: I took a trip to my university's bookstore to get a book I needed for class. It doesn't take that long to walk in, find the book, buy it, and get out- but just long enough that I miss my bus and have another half an hour to wait (and walking through the monsoon-caliber weather is not a highly desirable option). On this particular occasion, I figured it couldn't hurt to peek around the bookshelves to see what people were reading for other classes. Note: people generally don't care what other classes are reading. They get their books and get out. But being the nerd that I am, I wandered dreamily along the aisles of books, inspecting any works whose spines stood out to me. And one of them was Reading Lolita in Tehran. I think the combination of 'Tehran' and 'Lolita' is what was so striking, and after reading all about it on Amazon and skimming the first chapter, I'm rather excited for this new read. As with Catch-22 and 1984, I can only hope it will lend me a significant deal of perspective as I make my way in the world.

9. Nancy Drew by Carolyn Keene (as many as I can get my hands on)

• And at last, the time comes for the inevitable mention. I have a few lined up already: The Clue of the Whistling Bagpipes (which I started a while back and had to put on hold, in favor of a book on Progressivism in the 1912 U.S. Presidential election); The Clue on the Silver Screen; The Bungalow Mystery; The Mystery of the Tolling Bell. Just to name a few.
  

I'm hoping that I'll be able to find many of the out-of-print paperback books on Amazon for $1 or less, although I know one was asking $15 (plus shipping cost) for a used copy. If anyone knows of an alternative to Amazon, please let me know! Borders, Barnes & Noble, Half-Price Books, and every thrift store I go to will offer me a large collection of the original hardcover books (many of which I still need) but the paperback books are hardest to find. Give me a heads' up if you have any ideas!
And as always, stay tuned :)