You know those books where you could swear the author was just kidding the whole time? Well, here we go- it's another of those books. Although I must say, I can't blame the author for just having a bit of a laugh. These are Nancy Drew books, after all, and a young girl isn't necessarily going to know the difference- I certainly wouldn't have. I think every now and then, the next installment shouldn't be taken so seriously. And heck, this time around the joke was clear before I even opened the book. In other words, check out the sub-text on the cover:
On Valentine's Day in a culinary paradise, Nancy uncovers the perfect recipe for disaster!
These books are never without their witty remarks. And that's just the beginning- I made a point of counting all of the bad pun/play-on-words statements in the description on the back cover. Final count: 12. In a single paragraph. Allow me to lead you through it if you don't believe me...
When crime takes the cake [That's 1!], it's time for Nancy to eat, drink, and be wary! [2]
George's prize-winning Raspberry Chiffon Cake has earned her, Bess, and Nancy a week at the Wolfe Culinary Institute in upstate New York. But soon after their arrival, Nancy discovers that ambition, jealousy, and greed are also on the menu [3]. Attempted murder provides plenty of food for thought [4], but that's a mere appetizer to the dangers to come [5].
In her search for the chef with a taste for terror [6], Nancy knows she'll have to watch her diet and watch her back [7]. The kitchen is crammed with suspects [8], and tensions are fast coming to a boil [9]. The knives are all sharp [10], the ingredients are all poison [11], and the final course- most likely fatal- has yet to be served! [12]
I find it funny how through that entire description, the only thing anyone can gather about the story is that- once again- our girl detective has gone on vacay with her besties. Oh, and there's a mystery... or else someone just thought it would be funny to write 'jealousy' on the menu. I don't know about you, but that doesn't sound very tasty.
Just to clear things up, there are strange incidents going on at the institute that seem to be targeted mainly at two professional chefs each teaching classes for the program (one of the two is to be chosen as a permanent teacher at the institute, which incriminates both of them). And then the culprit turns his/her attention to Nancy, just because she's there (she really can't help the investigating- she does that part in her sleep). So that's the story.
Now let's open the book- no wait! What's this?!
Gosh, even the cover artist is enjoying himself! I know everything I need to know about this book before I've even started reading it.
And now, a ton of passages that I have very much been relishing the thought of ridiculing (hahaha... 'relish', get it? I know- I'm just as bad as these wisecrack ghostwriters).
First up, the girls arrive at the culinary school and are shown to their dorm room:
The girls fell in love with their room immediately. It was airy and artfully decorated, with dark mahogany paneling, purple velvet curtains, and an ornate Oriental rug. Still-life paintings of food adorned the walls. (5)
Okay, it's time for me to go all pessimistic-college-student on this description. While Nancy gets a large, pretty dorm room with mahogany and velvet, most college students get something else. Visually speaking:
What Nancy sees when she walks through the door...
Versus what the average college freshman sees when they walk in...
Nancy is high society wherever she goes. I bet you'd walk into the room next door to hers and find that it looks more like the one in the latter photo. Just because whoever gets that room is not Nancy Drew.
Now, allow me a moment to address the old issue of the origins of George's name (not in terms of etymology, but rather why George has a boy's name):
The woman flipped back a strand of long, curly auburn hair and rolled her eyes. "[Teddy is] short for Theodosia..." She studied George. "What about you? What does 'George' stand for?"
"Georgia," George replied, smiling with understanding. (7)
This adds to the old debate of George's name- while some books state that her name is short for 'Georgia', others claim that her parents wanted a boy child and, when she was born and they discovered otherwise, they named her George anyhow. I personally am a fan of the latter hypothesis. While it might not be as probable, I'd like to think that George has always been just George.
I realise that was a bit random- but if ever I write a Nancy Drew encyclopedia (and believe me when I say that's highly possible) clearing that up would be nice.
And speaking of random:
"Alicia's story sounds convincing, doesn't it?" Nancy said. "I can see Regis Brady resenting Alicia and trying to bully her into leaving the institute." She bit into a cranberry muffin. "Yum." (38).
This ghostwriter must really love food. They masterly intertwine Nancy's thoughts on the case with her contemplation of every bite of food she puts in her mouth. "Yum"... what stunning detail.
One of the best things about this book is the character of Regis Brady. Regis is one of the two professional chefs teaching in the program, and he is completely full of himself and overly pompous. My favourite 'Regis Moment' is when the chef (with his two dogs yipping around at his heels) gets a knife thrown at him.
As the knife clattered against the wall right behind his head, Regis dove under the table.
"We're under attack!" he cried out. "Peaches, Truffles, seek cover!" (44)
So I know someone just tried to kill him and all, but the language makes his reaction a little excessive. Talk about paranoia- I really think this guy is schizophrenic. Next, I bet he'll start hearing voices. Which actually fits in rather nicely with my next point:
Nancy pushed her way to the front of the crowd to see what was the matter. On the far wall, facing them, big red letters oozed and dripped like blood. The ominous message read: Who Will Be Next? (87)
Ya know, this sounds vaguely familiar...
OMG
no way.
I think Nancy needs to warn everyone to look around corners with mirrors and- should they be attacked- avoid looking into the creature's eyes, because the institute has a basilisk slithering around. They might want to check out the pipes and sewage system, since that's probably how it's been getting around. Oh, and keep a look out for Voldemort- he might be lurking in somebody's diary. But for now, it is likely the school will be closed. /Professor McGonagall
Except that, as it turns out, the culprit isn't Voldemort after all. It was just another of the students in the program- how not extraordinary. The only satisfaction I get out of this insipid ending is the fact that they lock up the culprit- quite literally, in his bathroom.
Nancy really knows how to please.
Which is why another installment is on the way... as always, stay tuned!
No comments:
Post a Comment